Neither an ordinary grammar nazi or nor a grammar snob, a the grammar czar is an the authority on all points of English usage: capitalization, diction, grammar, pronunciation, punctuation, rhetoric, spelling, style, syntax . . . you name it™. Why? Because she says so, that's why. And you do not argue with the grammar czar. Even typography conventions? Now that you mention it, sure, why not?
After all, the grammar czar herself uses idiosyncratic extra spaces around em dashes. Depending on her mood, she'll tell you she does it because she thinks it's easier on the eyes, because it helps distinguish dashes from hyphens, or because she thinks it looks prettier. The grammar czar can get real big on pretty at times. Did you catch that, grammar nazis and grammar snobs? No point in getting on the grammar czar's case. She does as she damn well pleases. She makes the rules and she won't hesitate to break them, certainly not if she's trying to make her point that breaking the rules can be fine if you know you're doing it and have a good reason for doing so. Of course, you may be wrong in that your readers may not care for your choice. If you're worried about that, why are you revealing your writing to perfect imperfect strangers? If you want your readers to be kind to you, stick to friends and family. Just don't get pissed off at them when they're not kind either. They won't be.
The grammar czar -- no, better make the initial characters capitals (perhaps all small caps?) from now on -- The Grammar Czar (TGC) knows no bounds for the powers she assumes.
Yes, TGC is a female -- namely me, Lillith Ms. Lillith Miss Lillith. Yeh, that's the ticket, Miss Lillith. You can forget that sexist czarina poppycock. And you can forget the alternative spelling tsar, too. That lacks the strong sound I want my title to have.
Wouldn't it be ridiculous to continue to refer to The Grammar Czar in the editorial third person now that the cat's out of the bag that I'm The Grammar Czar, stripped of all pretense of being omnipotent? With that revealed, I'm no longer the wizard, just the man woman behind the curtain.
What distinguishes her me from your run-of-the-mill grammar nazi is that she has I have absolutely no background, credentials, or research to back up my opinions. Hmm, perhaps that's not a distinguishing feature after all? . . .
Correction: I do have almost five years experience posting on internet message boards. That gives me enough experience with an I'm-not-listening-I-know-everything-I'm-always-right argumentation style that I'm confident I can pull this off. I've also read enough results-oriented end-justifies-the-means Supreme Court opinions, concurrences, and dissents to know how to get around or ignore points that work against my mine.
