The Definition to End All Definitions -- by Liz Balmaseda
A proposed revision to Webster's College Dictionary (Random House):
Cas.tro (kas'tro), n. Fi.del (FEED-hell), (Fidel Castro Ruz) born 1927, 1. Cuban revolutionary leader: prime minister 1959-1976; president since 1976. 2. A ruler exercising absolute power without hereditary right or the free consent of the people. 3. One who possesses a highly exaggerated or delusional concept of his own importance. 4. Rare tropical species, vampire-like in approach to prey. 5. Ominous inner child, the fidel that even some of his foes carry inside, the one that can be provoked in a moment of political paranoia. 6. A man who solicits customers for a prostitute or a brothel in return for a share of the earnings.
-- Adj. Not relevant; not applicable or pertinent to the future.
See definition of "dictator."
See definition of "megalomaniac."
See definition of "pimp."
-- Syn, (and other related terms). El tirano. (The tyrant). El caballo. (The horse). El del tabacon. (The one with the big cigar). El barbudo. (The bearded one). El que esclaviza la patria. (He who enslaves the fatherland). El que oprime la isla esclava. (He who oppresses the enslaved island). Fifo. (Fifo). La bestia de Biran. (The beast of Biran, Castro's birthplace in Oriente Province, Cuba). Fatigue fashion victim. Mastermind of the cigar conspiracy. HP. (SOB). El rey del Arbitron en Miami. (The king of Arbitron in Miami). The naked emporer. Hemisphere's most famous squatter. The original deadbeat dad. El Machista-En-Jefe. No mas.
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